Sunday 22 September 2013

Advice for Men after Divorce

Men after divorce often live a painful life, there is a great need of a professional advice to get rid off the unpleasant sufferings due to the psychological and emotional effects.

If you are looking for advice for men after divorce you are probably lost, or confused, or angry, or sad, or all of these things together! With the startling lack of support for men going through these issues it is no wonder us men find post divorce life a minefield that we navigate blindly.

Now, it does not need to be this way of course. Many guys have experienced this heart wrenching time in their lives and live to tell the tale. Some of them end up much happier than before once they sort through the issues, while others get mired in resentment, bitterness and negativity.

So what advice do you need to avoid the latter fate?

Well firstly, all men go through a process, a journey if you will. You will find yourself in stages of grief, depression, anger and finally acceptance. Men who are able to get through these phases quickly are usually more introspective and have a deeper knowledge of their own psychology.

This comes down to the root question of who you truly believe you are. When you lose your wife and your family unit due to a divorce your entire concept of who you are is challenged. This is a raging crisis below the surface, but often you only feel the surface emotions of anger, jealousy, resentment, depression the two big ones for men: Low self worth/self esteem and in many cases a feeling of deep emasculation.

Being able to deal with this crisis of EGO and SELF WORTH is how to get through a divorce and end up happy and healthy on the other end? It is not a short journey even for the most self aware man. However, being able to identify the destructive behaviours that are driven by these things and act to stop them at the root cause should be your goal.

If you want more advice for men after divorce that goes into more detail on these topics as well as the stages of divorce you will go through and even the day to day challenges you may face, click below to discover a complete guide written exclusively for men living life after divorce.

Sunday 15 September 2013

5 Steps of Divorce Recovery for Men and Women

There is a mental procedure that we all run through when confronted with scenarios including profound misfortune, for example an expiration in the family and likewise separation and divorce. As this is something that occurs over and over again we now know a general thought of post divorce recovery and how this plays out with 5 steps of divorce recovery for men and women.

Following are the 5 stages of divorce recovery for men:

Denial (Refusal)


The qualities of this phase of divorce are:
  • Not accepting the divorce will truly happen
  • Not considering the possibility of life after divorce
  • Not truly recognizing the results of divorce
  • Not interacting in a mature way with your wife or ex wife

Anger (Fury)


The anger stage happens when disavowal is at last broken and the actuality of the scenario at long last sunrises on you. It can have these outcomes.
  • Lashing out against your wife verbally, or more awful … physically
  • Taking your anger out on family, companions or even your kids
  • Being bitter, sharp, angry and withdrawn
  • Deliberately disrupting things for retribution
  • Taking up drinking or substance misuse
  • Being irate or angry at yourself

Bargaining (Haggling)


The phase of bargaining is a stage of desperation in post-divorce life. When you understand that outrage gets you no place you result in these present circumstances arrange and argue for things to be over as they were; or regardless to rescue to the extent that they can. A few things that may happen are:
  • Pleading for compromise with your ex wife
  • Blackmailing your ex wife to get back together or impact the conclusion of the divorce
  • Trying to the extent that you can once more of your old life instead of advancing with another one
  • Trying to sleep with your ex wife once more

Depression (Wretchedness)


Once bargaining doesn't work and you uncover the actuality of a last verdict of your separation hit you full power numerous men after divorce hit a time of feebleness and misery. This could be seen with a few issues, for example:
  • Withdrawal emotionally and socially from life
  • Lack of energy and reason
  • Full blown clinical depression or wretchedness
  • Crying (and often scorning yourself for it)
  • Suicidal musings

Acceptance (Acknowledgement)


This is the 5th phase and last stage of tolerating the separation and in completing so having the capacity to proceed onward. Acknowledgement is a method of putting all the antagonism of the separation behind you, acknowledging it is over and another life is standing by! In the event that you are entering this stage you might begin to feel:
  • Lifting of the sadness
  • Increased energy and reason
  • Freedom from enduring hatred
  • Being ready to overlook and forgive your ex and yourself

In the event that you need to know not only the 5 steps of divorce recovery for men, but also how to speed up via these and not be aught up in the destructive actions that they can happen, Divorce Recovery For Men, to find out more.