A Guide to Emotions - Men and Divorce

A Guide to Emotions - Men and Divorce

Men and divorce tend to have guys go through enormous emotional strain even though society often doesn't recognize it. So often the emotional pain of the divorced man seems to be glossed over in favor of helping women deal with their marriage break up. Men have emotions too though, and without understanding them we cannot work to resolve the issues that are causing us pain and hardship.

So what is going on inside a man’s head living in a post divorce world?

Surface Emotions

One the surface we know the feelings that control our minds after divorce, they are pretty easy to pick. Anger, sadness, fear, anxiety, jealousy and many more very negative emotions tends to crowd your mind and make it difficult to think clearly and act in ways that improve your life.

These emotions seem natural enough when your life is falling apart, but why are they so hard to deal with? Why do we get stuck in these modes and act out in damaging ways rather then resolve them? The answer may be that these emotions are not solvable by dealing with them individually, but instead looking even deeper into your mind and solving the conflict raging there.

Underlying Psychological Issues

These issues are not just deeper anger; they are conflict some would say of the soul. It is a fight between your ego which is how you view yourself in the world, and how it must change and adapt. The ego also HATES to change because it is a total reinvention of yourself, a step into the unknown. Combine this with an enormous drop in self esteem and you have a breeding ground for negativity and lashing out.

So what is a guy to do?

The real battle is not to bolster your self esteem as this is a fools game. It leads men to do very silly things to make them feel more powerful, more attractive, more in control. All these things can be stripped from you and are not real and lasting.

The real battle is to not be reliant on self esteem as your measure of self worth, but instead having the self respect in yourself to be at peace with who you are despite your circumstances and what other people think.

This is a complex topic that requires serious introspection and understanding though. If you want to know more about the hidden psychology of your mind is causing you emotional pain and stopping you from moving on from your divorce, click here to discover a battle plan for post-divorce recovery. Moreover, it will also help you in gaining best possible results for your dating after divorce.

Effects Of Divorce On Men

Effects Of Divorce On Men

There is a huge amount of data and anecdotal evidence on the hardship that women face after divorce. The effects on them clearly understood giving those women a better understanding of what they need to do, and allowing for better support. The effects of divorce on men however are a lot sketchier for a number of reasons.

• Men don’t often speak about their experiences
• Society expects men to simply ‘deal with it’
• There are more women’s groups willing to find these things out

There is of course a lot of anecdotal evidence of the negative effects of divorce on a man’s life and mental health which this article will cover.

Depression

Men get sad and low from losing their wife and their family. This is not a difficult thing to imagine, but full blown depression is also something that is very common. An overriding sadness that can limit every part of a man’s life, losing them jobs, friends and putting them in a pit they feel they cannot climb out of. This can even lead to suicide in some cases if they do not have any support of help to turn to.

Anger

Seemingly uncontrollable anger can manifest in men who were once mild mannered and friendly because of divorce. This can come out verbally or even physically against their ex, their family, their friends, or at the world in general. It is a destructive habit born of feeling so powerless and wanting to gain some power in the most primal way possible.

Loss of Self Esteem

A mans pride in himself is shaken when the women who promised to love him forever says she no longer does. His house, his family, and his place in the world is shaken so his self esteem plummets. This can bring on depression and anger and other destructive habits to make a man feel better about himself very quickly.

Loss of Status

A man is often judged by his marriage and family in our society rather than his personal character. This status of being a husband and a family man is a part of a man’s personality and the loss of this status makes other judge him poorly even if they do not intent to. Men after often seen as the cause of marriage breakdown too so this can often lead to a negative association to their status as a divorcee.

Alcohol and Drugs

Many men turn to substance abuse to numb their pain and have a high in the midst of a time of extreme lows. This can become addictive and lead to a post-divorce life even more miserable hat can hurt their finances, mental health, children, family and many more people who care about them.

Difficulty Trusting Women

One of the most poisonous effects of divorce on men is the broken trust that in some men never heals. While men may move on to other relationship an inherent distrust and often bitterness towards women in general can often remain that will destroy their attempts at future happiness.

If you are a man recovering from divorce and are having these effects impact on your life in negative ways then you need some help. Overcoming them can be a tough emotional battle, but you can be free of the divorce and happy again if you understand your mind beyond the surface emotions and have the tools to fix them. To get these tools to a happier post-divorce life, click below to find out more.

Get complete guide on divorce recovery for men that covers; effects of divorce on men, how to forget your ex wife and move on and more to get what you need to be happy again. Moreover, it will also help you in preparing yourself for dating again after divorce to meet divorced singles online and get you back on right path.

3 Divorce Recovery Tips for Men to Stay Sane

3 Divorce Recovery Tips for Men to Stay Sane

Divorce recovery can be a slow and painful process for men as you learn to live your life in a completely new way. Along this uncertain and painful journey you will encounter many small and manageable problems, but also some huge that threaten to overwhelm you.

You shouldn't be worried as its a temporary situation, the good news is that most men do come through this period eventually, but you want to move through it as fast as you can.

Following are 3 divorce recovery tips for men that will help you stay sane and move on from your divorce:

1. End the bitterness and resentment
2. Don’t feed your self esteem and ego
3. Get out there and live!

Find out about How to Stay Sane? 3 Tips to Divorce Recovery for Men in detail; these timely tips will definitely help all those men looking for complete road-map to divorce recovery that will prepare yourself as a happily divorced person being recovered from divorce and going after all the positive things like normal and general people do and dating after divorce feels like a fun to begin.

Divorce Recovery for Men

Divorce recovery for men can be a long and painful process, or it can be something you can work through in just a few days or weeks if you know how. This is not because some men cope better, or that some are soulless and emotionless robots. Recovering quickly from a divorce is all about understanding your mental state and being able to train your brain and emotions to get to the acceptance of divorce with a whole new attitude and sense of self respect.

To do this you need to understand that dealing with divorce is exactly the same as dealing with any sort of grief. The loss of a loved one causes many similar thoughts and emotions as does losing your wife, even she is still around. Let take a quick look at the cycle of grief.

Denial

Denial is the first stage which is where you have not fully accepted the reality of the situation. Often there is a lot of delusion here about what is happening and an overriding idea that things will be “back to normal soon”.

Anger

Once the reality does sink in however, the real hurt starts to set in and as a result the first, most primal reaction, is to hurt someone else and release the frustration and rage that is building inside of you. While most tend to only live in this zone for a short period, in some cases this anger stage can embed in every part of your life leaving you bitter and never resolving your grief.

Bargaining

Once the anger does subside and you can see the end coming and a new, sing, and scary life approaching you may find yourself bargaining. This is the acts of trying to salvage as much as you can of your old life. From asking her to take you back, to trying to work out bizarre arrangements that will never really work, this stage is a stage of desperation.

Depression

Once anger, begging, pleading, and many other measures have not worked and you realize it. You may find yourself drained of all energy and motivation. This is a dangerous stage called depression. Sometimes it is simply a prolonged sadness and lack of lust for life, other times it could be full blown clinical depression that come with suicidal thoughts.

Acceptance

Finally you will reach the final stage of divorce recovery for men; acceptance. Where you have climbed out of the pit of depression and realized that you must move on with your life. This must be reached to live a mentally healthy life and rediscover who you truly are, and what you really want in life. It means accepting what has happened has happened, and that the only way to move is forward without letting the shadows of your failed marriage influence your actions and thoughts anymore.

If divorced singles want to know about how to deal with each of these stages of divorce so they can move on without the emotional pain and turmoil these people need a comprehensive guide written by someone who has been there before.

Get complete guide on divorce recovery for men that covers all this and more to get what you need to be happy again. Moreover, it will also help you in preparing yourself for divorce dating again; meet divorced singles online and get you happiness back.

Divorce for Men – What As A Divorced Man You Need to Know to Recover?

Divorce for Men - What As A Divorced Man You Need to Know to Recover?

Divorce for men, how does it really affect a guy? Well, if you have never been through it, you may be forgiven for not quite understanding the gut wrenching feeling of having your entire life and dreams come crashing down around you. If you are going through a divorce, or are living in the aftermath of one, then you know this feeling all too well.

In the end though, this phase of your life has come to an end and you must recover from this monumental setback and move forward. This is always easier said than done, but there are a few important things you must know that will make this transition easier.

Dealing with Memories

Being flooded with memories of your ex, or your old marriage can sometimes get you low. It can even trigger entire breakdowns, so being able to deal with recurring intrusive memories is paramount to being able to move on.

One trick is to imagine your bad memories and worries like a film of dirt on your skin, then imagine taking a mental “shower”.

As you step into this imaginary shower feel the warm water coursing down your body and washing away that dirt and sweat off your body then down the drain.

Now really associate this dirt washing away with memories and bad feelings washing away. See an image of your ex-wife washing down from your heart off your body and down the drain.

Now feel that clean sensation of being clean after having a shower with this mental state. All the bad feelings washed away and a new clean you left in its place … refreshed and ready to go!

Dealing with the Now

One important part of dealing with the day to day stresses of life is that you must live in the now even if the now seems painful. The problem is not what is happening now, but the huge amount of baggage you have from the past.

As such, letting go of the past and just taking each day as it comes while living life in the context of the day and not the future, nor dwelling on the past. Being happy with yourself at each moment in time is what you need to have in your heart. That way your happiness resides inside of you, and is not controlled by external forces or other people.

Dealing with the Future

The future is something that can scare many divorced men because it is so unknown. Before it seemed so clear, but now you don’t know where you are going often because deep down you don’t really know who you are anymore or how to act as a single man.

This can be a very difficult problem to overcome and requires a deeper understanding of your own mind and psychology. Knowing exactly what the real problems are in your psyche gives you a much clearer view on how divorce for men can be overcome. To find out more about this approach click below and start living your life, not just existing.

Get Complete Guide For Post Divorce Recovery
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Divorce Advice For Men Trying To Cope

Divorce Advice For Men Trying To Cope

Men have traditionally been seen as always having good coping skills with whatever life throws at them. However, now that we look back upon those stoic role models we can see this is not true with rampant drinking, drugs, nightmares, anger, and many other ways that extreme stress (such as divorce) can act out. So instead of this, men need divorce advice for men trying to cope because men are not made of stone, they have emotions that need to be understood before they can heal the wounds of a marriage break up. Advice on moving forward after divorce will help all those men asking themselves; why can't I forget my ex wife?

So let’s look at a man’s mental state, and the divorce advice you need to help with it:

Denial

This is usually the initial reaction men have when they are faced with divorce. This is the belief that the divorce is not real, and that their wife (or ex-wife as it may be) will turn around and reconcile. This is a fantasy constructed not to deal with the reality of the situation. This also makes men try all sorts of silly things to try to win back their spouse.

The long you stay in this fantasy zone the harder it becomes to accept and move on. You must take the step and realize this is real and this is permanent. If reconciliation is ever to happen you need to be a whole and healed person anyway which means you must reform your life before you can possibly make any relationship work.

Anger & Resentment

This is what so many men feel after they realize the marriage is gone never to come back. This is the minds defense mechanism that makes you weary of your ex, marriage, and women in general. It also feeds on the deep need to make the person who hurt you, hurt just as much.

The problem is that anger and resentment do nothing to help your situation at all. Your ex will not be any worse off from your words or actions or thoughts. You only sabotage your own life and happiness by carrying this burden.

Depression

Once you let go of your anger, a deep feeling of sadness usually sets in. This is a part of the grieving process as you need some time to be alone and deal with the loss of your wife and your former life. Where this becomes dangerous is when it heads towards full blown depression. This can lead to many problems in your life and some men go as far as suicidal thoughts if they cannot get out of this phase.

There are two ways to deal with this. One is external, where you need connection with people and activities not just to take your mind off your sadness, but to develop those social links that buoy the human spirit. Being alone only makes things worse, having friends and family around you will help. The other is internal. This comes from understanding your own mind and why you are depressed and cannot move on. This takes a little bit of introspection and some understanding of psychology.

To understand these concepts related to divorce advice for men trying to cope more deeply and also how to deal with all the little everyday problems that come up in post-divorce life, download complete guide for post divorce recovery for more information that can end this nightmare and give you freedom and happiness once more.

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3 Rules Of Coping With Divorce For Men

3 Rules Of Coping With Divorce For Men

Coping with divorce? Divorce can be a confusing and frustrating affair in a man’s life! Everything seems disturbed, unfair, upside down, and really painful. Divorce for men can feel like a slippery slope that you keep sliding down no matter how much you claw and struggle against it. Some of divorced men turn to drink or drugs, other become severely depressed and withdraws. Some of the lucky guys however, manage to get out of this funk and live a happy post-divorce life … recovering from a broken heart is difficult but not impossible; how do divorced people do it? Here are 3 rules of coping with divorce for men that may also help you.

Let Go of the Past - you can do it

Divorcees past can play like a poisonous beast that can consume your energy in the present and bring you untold problems. If you hang on to the past, obsess over it, reply it in your mind over and over again and relive good and bad memories regularly you more firmly put this in the front of your mind prolonging the agony of divorce. Instead you must release that to history and fill your mind with then present day and the future.

Review Your Life Goals - give some time to think over

Divorce is not an ending of life and your future, it is a chance for every divorced men like you to really review where you are, who you are, and what you want to achieve. This rebirth is your chance to create the life you want, free of the constraints of marriage and without the same burdens you used to have. You can now dare to dream, dare to live how you want, work how you want, experience what you want. Sit down and actually write down these things and start planning for them!

Learn to Forgive - remember it's the basic key of a new foundation 

Forgiveness is the only way to get truly free of divorce and all the problems that come with it. If you travel through life holding a grudge in your heart you will end up in misery. It has even been proven that those who forgive more are healthier, suffer from less anxiety, depression, and other mental illnesses. Being able to forgive does not mean forgetting, or condoning actions, it simply means that you no longer let these things make you unhappy anymore. Even if you do not understand the reasons and never will, being able to forgive and live life without hatred and bitterness is the only way to be truly happy.

For more detailed information on coping with divorce for men, follow the links below to discover the secrets of recovering from a broken heart and divorce.

Get Complete Guide For Post Divorce Recovery
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